Sometimes we find ourselves in a conversation we wish we had never joined. We search for a way out, stare at the floor, try to back away, scan the room for an exit.
There is an easier way... have you heard of "Convoluted Sage-Like Response Defense"? For the sake of simplicity lets refer to it as CSRD. For the sake of a simplistic description lets say it is a 100% effective method for the avoidance of being pulled into unsolicited and/or bated conversations.
Here's an example of how it works...
Tom's Co-Worker:
Hey Tom, what do you think of all this partisan bickering in Washington? You have to agree it's all Bush's fault.
Tom:
Well, I'll tell you this... If a cat delivers a litter of kittens in an oven, that doesn't make em' biscuits.
Tom's Co-Worker:
Huh?
Conversation halted in it's tracks. A direct hit from CSRD.
Tom's other co-Workers:
Gosh, that Tom guy sure is sagely!
Yes, you look marvelous.
And it can also be used online. If you feel you are being sucked into an online "back and forth" that you are not comfortable with (or maybe the other person is just plain annoying) simply lay a little CSRD on them.
For example...
Facebook friend:
Hey! Look at me! Everybody! Look at me!
(The above is the generic equivalent to whatever your Facebook friend is saying. It doesn't matter what he or she is actually saying because it reduces mathematically to "Hey! Look at me! Everybody! Look at me!". I have a splendid proof for this but the limited space here prevents me from sharing it with you.)
You:
Well, that may be true, but you don't have to be a farmer to know it's easier to plow a field when you are walking behind the horse.
Facebook friend:
What?
Bulls eye!
I have also seen it used with great success on Twitter...
TwitterGuy:
This guy at work today compared Bush's obvious total blame for all our problems with baking kittens in an oven... or turning kittens into biscuits... or something like that.
(See how confused he is... ten hours after successful deployment of CSRD and it continues to mess with his mind).
TwitterGal:
How disgusting. Tell your boss to fire him.
TwitterGuy:
He IS my boss.
TwitterGal:
Oh you poor man.
TwitterGuy:
You agree with me don't you... IT IS all Bush's fault... Right?
TwitterGal:
Well, I'll tell you this... If a dog delivers a litter of puppies in a sock drawer...
